So did i make a new years resolution? Kinda with the leniency to have hiccups... my resolution is to focus on being POSITIVE... new yr new start... i am always a new me so doesnt need adding in ;)
Since my diagnosis of Aspergers it has resolved a few issues that have been whirling about since i was a kid... was i weird coz i liked quiet time with my mom instead of messing about with my mates... what was wrong with me as friends didnt stick around.... why couldnt i understand things others were grasping so easily...
Over the years different aspects popped up... i was diagnosed at 17 with depression after suffering with it since i was approx 14 then after dping fabulously NAFF at school and 1st yr of college i worked but cudnt hold a job...
I went back to college n on a 1-1 i flew thro english and maths with no revision... what on earth was going on! I worked on n off and studied... i even did car mechanics for 10 mths b4 being bullied out n giving up.
I paid to go to college and do an access course to uni i failed by 1% in sociolgy/psychology as u needed a min of 40% to pass (i wonder why!!!) But The University accepted me yay me i was on my way to being a learning disabilities nurse... i tried to do the assignments to the best of my ability but i wasnt understanding it and was failing dismally but i excelled in the practical side... i had set my sights on being an autism specialised nurse i was drawn to it (ohhhhh the irony!!!) After 2 attempts at yr 1 n failing most of yr 2 i was recommended to the student support ppl who twigged something wasnt right (you dont say!!!) I was tested for dyslexia and while i was under going the examination she said i had strong signs of ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) fine, another label that explained my academic issues but still didnt explain the obvious vulnerabilities n the too much trust i had also a lot of other things going on.. I didn't have a clue how things wud pan out. I met my ex (an emotional abuser who abused me and my gud nature wayyyyyy too much) i quit uni coz i was failing without the support i needed and i lost my interest.
I then had monkey (who is now 6.5yrs old) best thing ever but even with my ex i was pretty much a single mom sooo much stress and angst i was diagnosed with naturally occuring high levels of anxiety! Postnatal depression plus the abuse led to lots going on that shouldn't have...
I broke up with my ex when monkey was 2 and was still struggling to breakfree from his control (I STILL STRUGGLE WITH THE ANXIETY RELATED TO HIM) i was dragged through court and verbally abused and threatened by his family i had to endure nasty accusations and alsorts of dramas he inflicted on me but eventually had a viable excuse to cut him out of our lives last yr.. he still caused issues and stress but i left it to the police to deal with him so i cud reduce my stress levels...
Finally in 2014, a locum gp made a passing comment in relation to the anxiety about me sounding like i had autism... how odd i thought but it made sense having had so much to do with autism and cud relate to how they percieved things...
I had been seeing a member of the LIFT psycology dept and mentioned it to them... they asked how i felt about it and i explained i felt it fitted, they refered me and after several hours (5-6) of questions and questionnaires, in july 2014 i had a piece of paper saying yep i had it. On asking the lady who diagnosed me where i was on the scale i was the middle of the aspergers scale but wud have been more severe had it not been for my moms adaptive nature.. FANTABULOUS love my momsy!
It was the best explanation for my microfocus issues... i find myself sucked into a particular area to the point of exclusion of everything else including eating and drinking... mom keeps me grounded and is classed as my carer coz she helps with keeping me reminded of stuff and due to other health issues helps me maintain the house work etc...
Any way i thought id share a little of my journey to land me here. ..
Now back to My "resolution" of sorts... even though its the end part of the 2nd of january 2015 i have already had 2 positives occur...1st being i finally agreed to be on the design team for just inspirational challenges after my friend had mentioned me joining several times... and also confirmation kf a huge step forward to a new beginning for me YAY!!!
Im hoping i can remember to post here at least weekly to say any positives that occur... anyways....
HERE IS SOME OF MY LATEST COLOURINGS...
These 2 are faeryink digitalstamps i found them via facebook...
This one as you can see is an a4 piece i coloured... the artist's page is jadedragonne.deviantart.com i adore her work (sucha fun art mastery)
